Making the most of every CrampAir flight

TRAVEL ... with DAVID BRAY

Any time longer than two hours up the back of an aeroplane is unpleasant at best, approaching torture more often. It took me a while to find this out. In the early days of my life as a reporter, the award said we flew first class. That was eventually traded away in return for something else, probably more basic pay.

Then I had some years on desk jobs before coming back into the world as travel editor and everyone knows travel writers go business at least, first if there is such a class available. When that run came to an inevitable end we had a few years of buying our own tickets and they were not extravagantly purchased.
Now, 10 years into retirement and eight of them into circling the globe for Wagnerian opera, we discover that advancing years make cramped seating for long periods too uncomfortable. It’s business class for us for anything over two hours, or economy-plus if it’s offered. We prefer the latter. It provides business class or near seating and acceptable cabin service at a sensible price. Check out British Airways World Traveller Plus.
The idea came from Virgin Atlantic a good 10 years ago. Or Qantas’s new premium economy which offers “extra width and recline, more legroom, laptop power connection, self-service bar and more.
As of a few days ago, Qantas was offering these premium economy return fares: Hong Kong $2016. Buenos Aires $2995, Los Angeles $2997, San Francisco $2997, Johannesburg $3288. It’s also worth considering the half-and-half fares that take you to an Asian hub (Singapore, Bangkok,) at tourist rates, six or seven hours then the rest of the way to, say, Frankfurt, Vienna, Paris, London, in business.
For example: “Fly with Qantas to Singapore/Bangkok/Hong Kong/Shanghai or Tokyo in economy class and then step up in business class with KLM via Amsterdam to your choice of European destination. From $3999 + tax $650.’’
We did that a few times but gave it up after a very cramped Singapore-Brisbane leg that came after Copenhagen-Bangkok-Singapore in business. Must be getting old. But if you are younger, fitter, not so grumpy, and decide to go cattle class there are some things you can do to make the time go by more comfortably.
That caring and efficient travel company Flight Centre recently offered its Captain’s Top 10 Tips Things to take on a long haul flight. They are as follows:
1, A neck pillow. Sleeping almost upright isn’t easy, but a neck pillow can make it a lot more comfortable.
2.Noise-cancelling headphones. They reduce ambient sounds allowing you to enjoy music and movies in peace.
3. A good book or magazine. It’s amazing how the hours can fly by.
4. Flight socks can help prevent DVT and keep your feet nice and warm.
5. Moisturiser and lip balm. Your skin can get very dehydrated during a flight – these will feel like lifesavers. Just make sure to check with your airline on what liquids and gels can be taken onto your flight.
6 Roll-on deodorant. No worries about airline aerosol restrictions and a welcome relief for you and your fellow passengers.
7 A toothbrush. Just cleaning your teeth mid-flight can make you feel immediately refreshed.
8.Cards and games. Play by yourself or with a friend to make time tick away.
9.A change of clothes. Get more comfortable or just freshen up.
10.MP3/PMP player. What better way to kill time than to listen to your own music, audio books, videos or podcasts. To which I would add a sleeping pill (if you use them) and/or enough spare cash for a decent slug of alcohol. Not too much mind you, but sufficient to induce a few hours’ snooze. Even 30 minutes is makes a difference. Be sure your passport is on your person, and a pen, because you will need to complete paperwork before you land,
And, ideally, take with you someone you know well enough to lean upon while you doze and to pick your way over without embarrassment. Above all, take tolerance and a good mood.